Dating in japan vs america

Such cross-cultural marriages may have been pioneering in the late s, but these days they are overwhelmingly commonplace. A couple of years ago, when I was promoting a book on Yukio Mishima, I was interviewed in London by a Japanese journalist who suddenly asked me whether I too had a Japanese wife. When I told him that my significant other was Australian, he laughed at my eccentricity and remarked that in his experience, 90 percent of Western male scholars of Japan, when they had a wife, tended to have a Japanese one. Indeed, the overwhelming attraction of Western men to Japanese women has over the past 50 years been much commented on.

Japan and the United States have different views of dating and marriage. There are many similarities, as well. Marriage has a long history in Japan, a history that is based on gender roles influenced heavily by Confucian views. Keep in mind, I am an outsider looking in. The point of dating is to get to know someone.

However, be warned: If you want to read about bragging stories of all those Western guys who get laid a hundred times per day, then you came to the wrong place. There are tons of blog posts like that out there. You might ask yourself why is that? A lot of Japanese women want a guy that tells them several times a day how much he loves them.

Well, those are not just a plot tool. Asking someone out on a date is not the same as confessing your romantic intentions. Some adults may even be upfront about the prospect of marriage in their kokuhaku. It really takes the guesswork out of dating.